Today I had an epiphany but first I need to tell my struggle for my epiphany to make sense.
So, as you probably know I am in the very long process of becoming Catholic. It has been VERY hard for me so far. It has been intimidating, and Alex hasn't been behind me 100%, I have had a hard time reading the material because it is so many new concepts and words I don't understand, praying has been nearly impossible because I can't concentrate, and I have been in the worst mood imaginable for the last month. All summer Alex and I were doing a pretty good job regularly going to mass and all of a sudden we haven't been in weeks.
As a part of the process we have to attend mass and be apart of "rites", we get blessed and Father Porter anoints us with oil. Tonight I asked why it is oil instead of holy water and she told us that oil is a sign of strength. Ancients Romans covered their bodies in oil during battles so that nobody could get a hold of them because they would be so slick (haha). Oil also has several other meanings but I can't remember them all. The symbolization of the oil is that it protects us from Satan as we are entering this process. (the oil has been anointed also, its not just olive oil :P)
That really makes alot of sense to me, and it also makes sense as to why there have been so many obstacles in my way to trying to get myself together and have a spiritual life. And that is my epiphany, it will be nice when I feel God more than Satan because lately I feel like I have an evil cloud surrounding me.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
ipod shuffle
first ten songs that came up when i pressed shuffle on my ipod:
days go by. lifehouse (never listen to this)
so beautiful. Darren Hayes (no clue who he is)
hoedown throwdown. Miley Cyrus (ok she is good haha)
american idiot. Greenday (Greenday is ok I guess)
beautiful disaster. Kelly Clarkson (This was a great cd but I never listen to it anymore)
happy? Mudvayne (no clue)
my worst fear. Rascal Flatts (ew hate them!)
there's a wall. Miranda Lambert (ehhh, she was ok)
love is looking for you. Miranda Lambert (ok my shuffle sucks)
you get me. Michelle Branch (i listened to her in the 9th grade alot)
This was lame. I hardly ever actually listen to any of these people haha.
ok your turn!
days go by. lifehouse (never listen to this)
so beautiful. Darren Hayes (no clue who he is)
hoedown throwdown. Miley Cyrus (ok she is good haha)
american idiot. Greenday (Greenday is ok I guess)
beautiful disaster. Kelly Clarkson (This was a great cd but I never listen to it anymore)
happy? Mudvayne (no clue)
my worst fear. Rascal Flatts (ew hate them!)
there's a wall. Miranda Lambert (ehhh, she was ok)
love is looking for you. Miranda Lambert (ok my shuffle sucks)
you get me. Michelle Branch (i listened to her in the 9th grade alot)
This was lame. I hardly ever actually listen to any of these people haha.
ok your turn!
hello there Autumn. I love you.
Today I decorated my house for fall therefore, Happy fall! My pumpkin should be ready to pick in a few weeks so I can't wait for that :] I love love love fall. Now it is especially exciting because the 1 year countdown is fast approaching!
Alex and I have been trying to decide on a color to paint my room. After the pink is gone I think it will officially be "our" room. I am hoping he can paint it this winter because during the summer he is too busy with work and then next fall we will be too busy finalizing the wedding planning. So here is the color schemes I have been debating between. The only color he did not want me to paint it is yellow so I have free reign.
-Of course yellow was my first choice so I have to cross that off haha.
-teal with a purple ceiling (the same color purple that is in my bedroom and on my dressers)
-a warm plum. downfall of this is that I would have to re-paint the bathroom because it would clash
-red. may be too harsh and woudln't match a thing i currently own
-a soft periwinkle blue. love this color may give more thought to that. would have to re-paint my bathroom as well
Right now the teal is our first choice. We both love the vibrant color and it would look great with all the purple stuff I have.
On Saturday mom and I went to "The Perfect Dress" in downtown Salisbury and we found a bridesmaid dress that we both loved. We were most in love with the color. So glad this company has the exact color I wanted. It is a dark pink. PERFECT for fall. I am so excited. I really can't wait. 1 year 9 days
Saturday, September 11, 2010
sad day
My heart is so heavy today for many reasons.
I write in this blog for many reason's and now I think I need to vent. I will try to keep this story vague because frankly I don't know all the details. A friend of mine called me at 7am and told me that my ex killed someone last night. It was not pre conceived but non the less he took someone's life and it could have been prevented.
I feel so sad that an innocent life was taken, I feel sad for my classmate who lost a brother, I feel sad for his family, and all of his friends. I just feel sad.
Something that also makes me sad is that my ex will never change. He was always selfish. He didn't care who he hurt, as long as things went HIS way. He stole everything he could possibly could from me, his parents, friends, etc... and now he robbed someone of their life. And to those of you who told me that he has "changed" I hate to tell you but he fooled you once, don't let him fool you again.
rip hunter
I write in this blog for many reason's and now I think I need to vent. I will try to keep this story vague because frankly I don't know all the details. A friend of mine called me at 7am and told me that my ex killed someone last night. It was not pre conceived but non the less he took someone's life and it could have been prevented.
I feel so sad that an innocent life was taken, I feel sad for my classmate who lost a brother, I feel sad for his family, and all of his friends. I just feel sad.
Something that also makes me sad is that my ex will never change. He was always selfish. He didn't care who he hurt, as long as things went HIS way. He stole everything he could possibly could from me, his parents, friends, etc... and now he robbed someone of their life. And to those of you who told me that he has "changed" I hate to tell you but he fooled you once, don't let him fool you again.
rip hunter
Thursday, September 9, 2010
HELLO
Yes, I AM still alive! I have not made blogging a priority lately and that needs to change! Ok here is the quick rundown on how life is these days:
School: It looks to be a promising semester. My classes are easy, my teachers are hysterical, and I am hoping for the best. Here is what I am taking
Business Law
Small Business Mgmt and Entrepreneurship
Technical Writing
Women's Health (might as well just call this Being a Feminist 101)
Visual Merchandising (fun!)
Post Internship
Catholic Classes: It is going pretty well. I have alot of homework and reading to do for it. I find I spend more time studying for it than I am spending on my school work! Although it is going well I am still unsure if I am going to become Catholic- I think I may be a little to...."loose" to actually become Catholic. But I am enjoying the classes and maybe I will end up feeling like I am a good fit for the church.
Wedding planning: Haven't done anything! But once I am settled in school I have a huge list of things to begin. joy haha
Speaking of wedding's...last weekend I went to New Bern, North Carolina for Ben and Carrie's wedding. That was such a fun wedding! I had a great time and want to go back. New Bern was the cutest town, the hotel was very nice, the wedding was beautiful and long haha, and the reception was AWESOME. Open Bar (I tested every flavor of wine), smith island cake, the most tender piece of meat I had ever tasted, awesome music, and a good time had by all. I would literally re-do that night once a week if I could! I was also in great company which never hurts anything :]
Haircut- Ok, I know its been over a month since I cut it but everybody is still talking about it and I think its ok to profess again how much I love it! I keep learning new ways to style it. Today I took the blowdryer and had it on MAX and then sprayed the hairspray on the hair that was standing up. IT was so cool! This is the first time I have ever had a hair do that actually had "style" to it. Its fun and I am so glad I did it!
Have an awesome day to all who read this :D
School: It looks to be a promising semester. My classes are easy, my teachers are hysterical, and I am hoping for the best. Here is what I am taking
Business Law
Small Business Mgmt and Entrepreneurship
Technical Writing
Women's Health (might as well just call this Being a Feminist 101)
Visual Merchandising (fun!)
Post Internship
Catholic Classes: It is going pretty well. I have alot of homework and reading to do for it. I find I spend more time studying for it than I am spending on my school work! Although it is going well I am still unsure if I am going to become Catholic- I think I may be a little to...."loose" to actually become Catholic. But I am enjoying the classes and maybe I will end up feeling like I am a good fit for the church.
Wedding planning: Haven't done anything! But once I am settled in school I have a huge list of things to begin. joy haha
Speaking of wedding's...last weekend I went to New Bern, North Carolina for Ben and Carrie's wedding. That was such a fun wedding! I had a great time and want to go back. New Bern was the cutest town, the hotel was very nice, the wedding was beautiful and long haha, and the reception was AWESOME. Open Bar (I tested every flavor of wine), smith island cake, the most tender piece of meat I had ever tasted, awesome music, and a good time had by all. I would literally re-do that night once a week if I could! I was also in great company which never hurts anything :]
Haircut- Ok, I know its been over a month since I cut it but everybody is still talking about it and I think its ok to profess again how much I love it! I keep learning new ways to style it. Today I took the blowdryer and had it on MAX and then sprayed the hairspray on the hair that was standing up. IT was so cool! This is the first time I have ever had a hair do that actually had "style" to it. Its fun and I am so glad I did it!
Have an awesome day to all who read this :D
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
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